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Natalie's avatar

I remember in College when I would date multiple people as a way to find an ideal person and it just confused me in the end. I played a big comparison game, which I don't think benefitted anyone and I kept coming back to this idea that I liked a bit of boy A, boy B had it down in the look department and boy C had a lot of potential as well (he was a bit quiet but if i gave him time?). In the end, I came to the realisation I was being selfish and trying to "build my perfect man." None of these boys were terrible, all lovely in different ways, but I didn't do myself any favours by trying to select just the right amount of their personality. I couldn't ever expect any of them to invest in something deeper with me, if I couldn't do the same in return.

This was a "grass is always greener on the other side" situation. It personally wasn't for me because I was looking for something more serious in the end — which I didn't realise until later on. You learn something about yourself though and you do get a bit of fun along the way *wink *wink.

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The Single Chronicles's avatar

Oh my gosh that sounds like too many boys to keep track of ahaha

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Halle Martin's avatar

First of all, woman after my own heart. I too cannot seem to manage the dating multiple people at once. If not from a preference point, then purely from a time management, mental exhaustion standpoint.

Second, literally have the same thought around sitting next to each other. It is soo much better.

Also gilets 😂 justified ick.

Third, those double dates would be phenomenal. Looking forward to hearing how it develops 😘

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The Single Chronicles's avatar

Will hopefully have updates in the next couple of weeks 🙈

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The Single Chronicles's avatar

I’m glad it’s not just me who struggles to keep up with it all! And that we have the same icks ahaha

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Elaine R. Frieman's avatar

Very insightful! Yes, in the past, I used to date multiple people or have people on the hookup back burner but like you, I always was leaning towards one or to preferences, the person I wish I was beside in bed instead. 🙈😬 And by the sounds of it, like you, also sometimes those people I romanticised or chased weren’t the “healthiest” options. But in my very last year of my 20s, I did find an option who was handsome, exciting, sexy, and appealing (everything I wanted) and who was the one I kept going back to (and we have been together over eight years now) so I got there in the end. 🤪 Keep living life and doing things the way you’re doing it. It’s all about living and learning and sometimes I’d like to be all woo woo and think things happen as they ought to happen. Who knows? In a few weeks’ time this guy may make you swoon the way Scottish guy did. He may turn out to be a deeper connection and exactly what you needed. 🫶🏻

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The Single Chronicles's avatar

Aww this is the advice I needed to hear! <3 Glad to have some validation to keep going on my somewhat messy path ahaha

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Elaine R. Frieman's avatar

Eveyrone has their own path and sometimes the messy one is exactly what you need! At least you’ll have stories to tell. 😉

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Elaine R. Frieman's avatar

Eveyrone even* 🤣 Don’t think there’s a comment edit feature 🤪🙈

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